writing

So far I'm up to 2 pages, single-spaced, with three small images. I feel like it's going horribly, I have almost no flow. I'm already halfway through my outline, so I feel like I'm not writing enough.

I feel that maybe reading more would help, but I've read so much and it's just not flowing like usual. I suppose I ought to bring what I have to C and get advice. I feel like I'm totally floundering.

Pictures!

Here are pictures from my slicing on Friday.

The whole of practice brains. They were harvested by myself and my labmate A. The two circled in blue are the ones I know are mine.

Here's the one I chose mounted. You can see that it got a little warm and also that half the olfactory bulb snapped off when I moved the head too close to the razor when I started.

And here are some of the slides. The rolling effect is pretty obvious, and I included one of my major screw-ups 'cause, well, nobody's perfect. The landmarks are relatively clear, though, considering I took these with my digital camera:


So there's Friday's work (or parts of it). Now to write up a list of chapters.

Yippie! (Sorta)

Good things! My contract is finally up on TheHub. S agreed to be my committee member, and C gave me two books from which I found ~100 pages worth of good stuff!

Bad things that the HALA conference stuff is really getting to me. Ugh.

EH&S training on Wednesday, meeting with committee at 11am Thursday.

Friday in the Lab

Friday I found someone to take the pack for me and I went to UMass to slice another brain. It took 3 hours but I had to do a lot of troubleshooting. The slices continued to roll under the roll bar despite adjusting the temperature to -21C. I also took pictures of one slide from each set, which I will process and put online.

I found a handful of older papers of vole work and OT/maternal behavior work.

Tuesday's Day in the Lab

Tuesday I went to the lab for my second s&h. This one was easier, both emotionally and practically. I did a good job, all my practice brains came out beautifully. U asked me to take out an experimental brain for her (she needed to check the placement of a cannula), which I thought I screwed up but the gouge in it was so large that I've determined it must've been from something besides me. I'm good enough now that I would've noticed if I'd made such a huge mistake.

This week:
Animal Care Training
EH&S Training
More CryoStat (two more brains?)

Today's DIL Report

Today I went to the lab to use the CryoStat (it turns out it was just locked last week, and it just needed the "lock" button pushed). I sliced an entire brain. It was one of the four from last week (two were mine, two were U's) and it was definitely one of mine -- the olfactory bulb was quite messy and folded under the cortex. There was also a large slice through part of the cortex which C thought was from uneven freezing.

Also! C came with me, which was awesome. She graded papers at the desk next to the CryoStat while I sliced and looked over my slides. She says that they're very good, even amazing considering it was my first time slicing. Every set of slides she'd look over my slices and show me landmarks from the mouse atlas. That was the best part of the day, looking over my slides with C and her teaching me what on the brain corresponds to what in the atlas and some of the functions of certain major structures.

As for the actual slicing, I think it was pretty good. The olfactory bulb messed up the first few sets of slides and I had some serious cracking issues, but they couldn't be resolved by adjusting the temperature which means it was most likely a problem with the brain itself. I got a lot of a sort-of "venetian blind" effect, where the slices had a series of parallel horizontal cracks. Both C and U said that it's not desirable but also not abnormal and that there's really nothing I could do about it. Looking at the slices, it didn't seem to mess them up too badly.

At some point I'm going to bring my camera into the lab and take pictures of my slices so that I can look them over enlarged, digitally, and compare them to my later slices (as well as include them in my DivIII portfolio).

Next Tuesday U, A and I are going to harvest more brains, which is great for getting me more exposure to animal sacrifice. I definitely prefer slicing brains to harvesting them. That said, I still want to get it perfect. I want my brains to look like this every time:





In other news, I got a note from Laurie today requesting a letter for Rayane's file (and I assume one will come for C's too) so I better get on that. I also need to put my DivIII on TheHub so that S can read it. So, list!

To-Do by Friday:
TheHub DivIII Proposal
Rayane's Letter
C's Letter

(Backdated Entry)

On this day (since I am writing from THE FUTURE) I went to the lab to learn to use the CryoStat from Se and to harvest brains with U. There were no practice brains, so Se couldn't do more than walk me through the process and mime the actions. When U showed up we harvested brains for practice from some male voles.

I had a severe reaction to watching the animals be sacrificed. H has suggested I start a journal about my feelings towards this subject so I can remember everything. I will be starting that journal but it will be password-protected.

Besides my emotional state in the lab, the day went rather well. I extracted four brains, of which two were not so mangled that I could practice slicing on them. My first brain took about 15 minutes, my final brain was less than 5 min. U says that my learning is very fast and she thinks I am talented at removing the brains.

I need the most work with the olfactory bulb. The skull is very thick over it so it's difficult to remove without harming it. It's also gooey-er than the rest of the brain, so it gets squished or disoriented much more easily. I know what I need to work on.

Moving along very nicely

I've now been to two lab meetings and had two private meetings with U. It looks like I'll be picking up where her former student left off, doing the in situ hybridization of vole brain slices. I read the protocols over the weekend and it looks like 50/50 stuff-I-understand and stuff-I-don't. Hopefully that's a good ratio.

This week I'm going to meet with Se, one of her graduate students, who will teach me how to make slices in the CryoStat. U said she'd meet with me before that to harvest some male brains for me to slice.

The project is moving along nicely. My only problem right now is that I'm squeemish about killing the animals.

Met with U

I met with U at her lab meeting on Tuesday. I emailed her to find out when she is available to meet with me personally, but she has yet to respond. It looks like a good situation, though, and I'm excited to work in her lab.

I don't think I'm going to know what I'm doing fast enough for the CBD proposal, unless I write it more generally, but then I will probably not get any funding.

Actually Updating Helps

Thursday: As I mentioned a post or so ago, I contacted companies and analysis of samples is very expensive ($700-1,000 depending on the company). Rayane contacted Axys Environmental and spoke to one of their analytical chemists, who explained why it's so expensive. It is standard to spike samples with radioactive PBDEs, as somehow this helps the chemists figure out what the baseline background levels are (or maybe a ratio or something). Radiolabeled PBDEs are expensive, about $1000/mL. This is necessary because the risk of contamination is so high.

But how high is it? The chemist told Rayane something like, "A new couch in the building will contaminate your samples." So, basically, the work is so sensitive that it wouldn't be possible to get good analysis on campus, so I'd have to send my samples to an external lab, which is just prohibitively expensive.


Friday: C asks me 100 questions about my feelings on animal research. Apparently there's an opening in Professor U's lab at UMass. Prof. U works with prairie voles, which is something I looked into for my DivIII when I was in C's Comparative Animal Physiology class. Prof. U had a senior doing a project that is somehow integral to her research, but he can't do it anymore so she needs a student to pick it up.

I don't know what the project is, but I even remember talking to C about Prof. U two years ago when I was interested in prairie voles and vasopressin/oxytocin. I am very excited to find out what's open for me over there.

The bad news is that Rayane will not be on my committee if I'm working with animals, so I have to rebuild it. C will be my chair, and she's already shuffled some of her DivIIIs around so that she can fulfill that. I think I'll ask S if she wants to be my member, once I find out exactly what I'm doing.


Assignments for break:
Email Prof. U
Read Prof. U's work and any other papers she recommends
Write for C and Rayane's reappointment files
Breathe

The Return Call

The rep from Eurofin called back. I missed her call, but she left a message which was very slow with lots of "ums" and "uhs," but she said the PBDE analysis was only done on fish oils and that it cost $750 per sample. Then she said her number at the speed of light and hung up.

Is this the end of our hero? Stay tuned 'til next time...

Start of Funding Proposal (and: harrassing corporations still gets you nowhere)

I have a draft, though it is poor and both too detailed but not detailed enough and very reflective of my general cluelessness of how to write a funding proposal. There are some good ideas, though, so it is something to work with. It can be found here.

I spent a good amount of time (about 2.5 hours, for anyone keeping track) on Thursday looking for chemicals. I seriously harrassed Chemtura (Great Lakes is now a part of Chemtura) to find PBDEs, but nobody high on the corporate foodchain was available and everything else directed me to customer service, who said they didn't have PBDEs available anymore. I sent 3 emails, no response yet, but that's expected. Maybe I'll get something back, who knows.

I also found this site, which I have to go through company-by-company.


EDIT: This is noteworthy. re: Sample analysis.

I have contacted Lars Reinmann about PBDE analysis, and I also called their customer support line, for which I should be getting a return call any second now....

The Past Week

I spent most of the past week passing DivII. I had my final meeting this morning, and my committee has agreed to pass me; however, I have to run around getting administrative things together. Herb Bernstein still owes me an evaluation, one of my evals still needs to be proofread and finalized. Once those things are done and my committee signs my new contract, I will be out of DivII.

Besides that, I was working on my Physical Organic and Organic I. Organic I took a staggering amount of time last week, occupying all of my Wednesday from 8am to 7pm. I don't anticipate that happening again, though, and Rayane has told me that it should be a 2 hour set-up in the future.

I've been looking for sources for PBDEs, but I just can't seem to plug the right words into the Google search field. I know they're out there, though, so I just have to keep trying at it. Rayane suggested going back to UMass (the program is called SciFind?) and also talking to Helaine, so since the internet is failing me, I will try those routes.

As for funding, I've asked Rayane for a sample research proposal to use as a model, which will help me greatly to writing my proposal.

More as more comes.

Good News!

I couldn't get to the science library this weekend because I'd forgotten about the Signer Seminar, which took up the business hours on Saturday, and Gin & Tonics auditions on Sunday, but I did get there today and had good luck. Paulina, one of the librarians, helped me significantly.

The article is titled "Synthesis and Characterization of Polybrominated Diphenyl Ethers - Unlabelled and Radiolabelled Tetra-, Penta-, and Hexa-bromodiphenyl Ethers." BDE-47 is tetra-BDE, BDE-99 is penta-BDE, so I'm set for the two I need the most. It is also the reference for every article I read in which the authors synthesized their own PBDEs. So the synthesis works, I just have to do it.

Ingredients
- phenol (got it)
- bromobenzene (got it)
- 1,3 dibromobenzene (either got it or can make it easily)
- m-bromophenol (don't think we have it, but I can make it or buy it)
- bromine (got it)
- copper bronze (I think we have it)
- NaOH (totally got it)
- iron powder (how could we not have it?)
- CuCl (I) (got it)

So my assignment for today is to read these procedures and be 100% sure of how to do them so I can get started in lab as soon as possible.

EDIT: Also on the slate for tonight is to finish my DivII portfolio - my committee wants final copies tomorrow for a pass meeting next Monday.

EDIT 2.0: I've also been having problems with my new lappytop, so I have to do some work on that today so hopefully I can get Linux up and running and be able to transfer everything over from my old lappy. This is probably the most time consuming thing I have to do, but at least I'm having computer problems now instead of March.

EDIT 3.0: And a follow-up from Friday's last post, I decided not to take the MCAT. It's better to get the best score I can, even if I eventually decide I don't want to go to medschool. As a good test-taker, I might have gotten a decent score, but I decided that no matter what I got I'd end up feeling like I could have done much better, and that now is just the wrong time. Also, I feel it's generally a good idea to follow the advice of the Premedical Advisor. Carin Rank suggested I take it in August, so I think I'll do it then.

Companies, Libraries and Some Other DivIII Related Things

I called HP and Dell (HP still uses PBDEs in some products, Dell doesn't) and ran into the expected problem: navigating computer companies is impossible. I managed to leave a message with the HP labs, but Dell was just not going to happen. I'm going to try some more of the companies who no longer use the PBDEs on Rayane's suggestion that they are probably more likely to donate or sell them cheap.

Tomorrow I'll go to the UMass Science Library to look up syntheses on Beilstein. It took me a bit but I did find their hours, which I'm linking here so I can find it again easily in the future.

Other Stuff
Planned Parenthood Internship: I sent off my application to PP today, and I wrote in my cover letter that I'd call to follow up next week.
Physical Organic Chemistry: I missed the first day due to EMS, but I picked up the class notes, reading a syllabus today.
Organic I TAship: I agreed to help with setup/cleanup for the Organic class, and I told Herb I won't be TAing his Physics class. He agreed with Rayane that though the Physics class will benefit more from me, I will benefit more from the Organic class. He'll probably harrass me for help anyway, but not making a commitment means I can say no. As for the Organic class, it looks like a good experience for me. I enjoyed stopping by the lab on Wednesday.
MCAT: My MCAT is scheduled for tomorrow. The earliest meeting I could get with Carin Rank was yesterday, and when I spoke to her she said I shouldn't take it this weekend, but rather next August. Now I'm stuck having to decide between taking the tomorrow and in August (both scores are sent to medschools) with the potential of getting a bad score versus not taking the test tomorrow, losing my $260 and paying another $220 for the August date. I am finding this very stressful, and I am unsure what is the best decision.

More on Companies Using PBDEs

I'm having trouble finding the companies that actually use these things. My next step is to just call them arbitrarily (I'm thinking of contacting Dell first). I have found some interesting info, though.

"The only US manufacturer of Penta- and OctaBDE commercial mixtures voluntarily ceased production in December 2004." (Environment Canada)

Connecticut has already banned PBDEs.
California and Washington have as well. (NOTE: California did not ban decaBDE, which is the most commonly used)

EDIT:Many of the "big names" have already stopped using PBDEs in response to bans in Europe. Guess I won't be calling Dell, but maybe I can find them somewhere else?

Looking for PBDEs

So today I'm looking for a reasonably priced source of PBDEs. It looks like most chemical suppliers are asking somewhere around $170 for them. Rayane suggested I call companies and ask for donations or if they'd sell me some, which is crazy enough it might just work.

The other option is that I make them, which will be very time consuming and difficult according to my current synthetic knowledge, but I think I could do it. Rayane pointed me to Beilstein, which is available at UMass and will be of infinite help if I have to go this route.

More on calling the companies later. If I have to make the chemicals, I'm going to have to get on that ASAP because it will undoubtably take me a long time to make them.

Grant Information

Ran around looking for grants today. I went down to the prez's office, it looks like the Prince Grant would apply to me, but it's a very small grant. Since I'm looking for about $1,000, I'll have to find another source of funding. I may even need more money if the PBDE samples cost a lot.

I also talked to Laurie in the NS office and she said I'm basically out of luck. Maybe I can find an external grant? ~$1,000 is so much money for me and so little money for companies. Either that or maybe Denise O'Neill will switch to the fall.

If I can't pull together the money for the project, I'm going to have to come up with something much cheaper. It would be upsetting to see this project killed before it even got off the ground.

First Meeting

The first meeting with Rayane, Elizabeth and Cindy was today. We discussed the (hopeful) direction of the project to eventually analyze breast milk samples, but mostly the discussion was geared towards what needs to be done now and this semester.

My first tasks are to find a source of PBDEs in order to test the sensitivity of our instruments here and to write a proposal. It looks like PBDEs are very expensive from chemical providers, so I'll have to do more hunting.

To Do:
- Get info about grants at Hampshire
- Search for PBDEs
- Start proposal